Puffins Lead Iceland's Rebranding Campaign
Cuter than a penguin, but is it enough?
Now that the ash has settled, literally and figuratively, Prime Minister Jóhanna Sigurðardóttir has unveiled her plan to revitalize Iceland.
"I can't take all the credit," she said during a recent phone interview. "Actually, we've consulted with Disney. We've given them carte blanche to redesign and rebrand the entire country. The changes will be swift."
By the end of 2011, all transportation in Iceland will be replaced with a single monorail that circles the country, requiring a new state-issued E-ticket pass. The Eyjafjallajökull volcano will continue to be a main attraction, although it will have to be replaced with a mechanical version set to erupt once an hour for the tourists.
"And," said Sigurðardóttir, "we're bouncing around ideas for animatronic Vikings. You know, to greet people at the airport. State of the art. They'll make the Pirates of the Caribbean look like, well, a Disneyland ride!"
"I can't take all the credit," she said during a recent phone interview. "Actually, we've consulted with Disney. We've given them carte blanche to redesign and rebrand the entire country. The changes will be swift."
By the end of 2011, all transportation in Iceland will be replaced with a single monorail that circles the country, requiring a new state-issued E-ticket pass. The Eyjafjallajökull volcano will continue to be a main attraction, although it will have to be replaced with a mechanical version set to erupt once an hour for the tourists.
"And," said Sigurðardóttir, "we're bouncing around ideas for animatronic Vikings. You know, to greet people at the airport. State of the art. They'll make the Pirates of the Caribbean look like, well, a Disneyland ride!"
With so much bad press due to the financial meltdown, it was also decided Iceland could start with a clean slate by simply renaming the country.
"The name change? Sure, it was a big decision. But Disney, pioneers in exit interviews at movie theaters, found out that people--especially children--love penguins. And what's a puffin, if not a cuter, more colorful, more cuddly version of a penguin? So that's how we came up with Iceland's new name: Puffin Island.
Critics of the plan say it's not radical enough.
"If we're turning our country into a family-friendly amusment park, "said a hotel manager who preferred to remain anonymous, "then why don't they shut down all the geothermal spas? We have a new image to maintain. Can't have naked people splashing around everywhere. It's just not Disney."
Sigurðardóttir remains unfazed by the naysayers. "Nude bathers will have a place to call their own on Puffin Island. Goodness, between the new Spa Tax and projected plush puffin sales, Iceland--I mean Puffin Island--will be in the black in no time at all."
"The name change? Sure, it was a big decision. But Disney, pioneers in exit interviews at movie theaters, found out that people--especially children--love penguins. And what's a puffin, if not a cuter, more colorful, more cuddly version of a penguin? So that's how we came up with Iceland's new name: Puffin Island.
Critics of the plan say it's not radical enough.
"If we're turning our country into a family-friendly amusment park, "said a hotel manager who preferred to remain anonymous, "then why don't they shut down all the geothermal spas? We have a new image to maintain. Can't have naked people splashing around everywhere. It's just not Disney."
Sigurðardóttir remains unfazed by the naysayers. "Nude bathers will have a place to call their own on Puffin Island. Goodness, between the new Spa Tax and projected plush puffin sales, Iceland--I mean Puffin Island--will be in the black in no time at all."